The Smile

Semina's Past



Wednesday, November 08, 2006

She Smiled Through Her Tears

Semina’s Father told her that she is now old enough to walk from the bus to his apartment by herself.
This made Semina feel very mature, after all she was now ten years old.
She had not been to see her Father for five weeks. The last time she was with him he went to the furniture maker to look at the new bed he had ordered. He told Semina to stay in the showroom while he went into the shop with the Master Carpenter. Semina was puzzled, why does he need a new bed he has a perfectly good one in his bedroom.
While Semina waited for her Father in the showroom, she touched and stroked the furniture with her eyes closed. She did this to see how the Master Carpenter felt, he is blind, how does he do his work when he cannot see. Semina loved the feel of the wood and the lines of the furniture, smooth lines and a polished finish, it felt beautiful in her hands. This is how he must do it, stroke the furniture and feel the lines and the smoothness of the finish. Semina smiled to herself.
Semina’s Father came back to the showroom and told her that they were going to her cousins Greta’s house and that she was to spend the rest of the weekend there.
Semina and her cousins Greta’s family were having dinner when Greta’s brother looked at Semina and said “Are you going to the wedding on the east side” Greta’s Mother right away shushed the Brother and told him to finish his dinner. Semina was puzzled and wanted to ask questions, but was afraid, because Greta’s Mother can be very scary.
Five weeks later Semina got of the bus and started walking to her Father’s apartment, when a man, woman and a small child that had been on the bus, caught up with her. The woman said “Are you Semina?” Semina did not know this family, but she was being polite and told the woman that she was. Then the woman told her that they were going to the same place. The woman then said to her “It is too bad that you won’t be having a little sister or brother” Semina was puzzled, but smiled at the woman without saying anything. Semina did not know what she was talking about.
When Semina and the family from the bus arrived at the apartment, her Father opened the door and invited everyone inn. Semina took her hat off in front of the mirror that faces the bedroom. In the reflection Semina saw a woman in a new bed, in her Father’s bedroom. This was the bedroom that used to be her parents room, when they were a family.
Semina froze, she did not know what to do. The family from the bus was in the bedroom kissing the woman in the bed. Semina when she looked closer could see that she was the woman that cooked the food and owned the place where her Father used to get his dinner. Why is this woman in bed and why is she in her Father’s bedroom?
Semina’s Father came out of the bedroom and said to her, “Come and say hello to my new wife” All kind of thoughts were spinning in Semina’s head as she tried to smile and be very polite. All eyes were on her, she put her hand out to her Father’s new wife and said “Hello, I am sorry that I cannot stay” Her Father quickly said “You are going to stay with your Aunt this weekend and you will visit us” Semina looked at her Father and asked him to come out to the hall to talk with her. Her Father did what she asked.
Semina now very angry said to her Father, “I am going back to my home, and I will visit you when you have time for me” her Father slapped her face and said “You are more like your Mother every day” Semina smiled through her tears and said in a small voice “Thank You”. She put on her hat and coat and left the apartment, as she was going down the stairs Semina heard her Father yell “Come back here ~ don’t be such a brat ~ you will like her when you get to know her ~ Semina come here, I tell you” Semina went out the door of the apartment building, with tears blinding her, she squared her shoulders, put her head up and walked towards the bus station. Her Mother will give her hugs and kisses and tell her that she loves her, when she comes back home.

Smiled by Semina :: 10:03 AM :: 9 smiles

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At Wednesday, November 08, 2006 3:45:00 PM, Blogger tsduff said...

Another well written chapter. I can feel the pain and confusion of the young girl as she deals with life's bumps. Your description is so lovingly detailed - as when she feels the wood. As spoken from the heart.

At Friday, November 10, 2006 9:09:00 AM, Blogger Miz BoheMia said...

I am sitting here teary eyed my dear Semina... I want to hit your father... I am sorry to say this but I do, slap him right back for slapping you and for hurting you so!

I know that pain all too well... such people should not have children to begin with but I applaud ten-year-old little Semina for standing up for herself at such a young age and having the courage to follow her heart, her guts and to walk out of there back to where she is #1... into her mother's arms... just where she deserves to be as there she is the utmost priority!

Beautifully told and I too loved your description of the wood and the feel of it... I too love that... there is so much magic in touching something so well worked and made with love...

At Friday, November 10, 2006 4:31:00 PM, Blogger Semina said...

I am touched my dear MizBohemia. To his credit, he had never hit me bofore and did not hit me again.
I am also rather proud of Semina, I was thinking about this and I think Semina got her strength through that slap.
However, the insult of not being included in their wedding and other times later, is something that was hard to swallow.
Semina has all her life loved beautiful things to touch, smell, feel and hear.
I am so glad you like my writing ~ this has been so good for me, I understand so much more now that I am looking at Semina's young life :}

At Sunday, November 12, 2006 11:41:00 AM, Blogger Minka said...

That is one of teh most powerful "Thank You!"s I ever read about.
10 years...unbelievable.

I have two pictures of me as a young child and I look at them and I just wanna lift that little girl, looking back at me, out of teh picture, hug her and tell her she is loved, will be loved and always should love. Tell her that things will be ok... seems to are doign the same with writign about young Semina.

i can´t wait for the next installment...I hope we all will grow with her!

At Sunday, November 12, 2006 7:07:00 PM, Anonymous neva said...

oh, dear lovely Semina, i'm so sorry you had to have such an uncomfortable and unhappy experience. somehow i suspect your father was just too ignorant and/or awkward to understand what he was doing to you. some adults are stupid that way. they assume their children will accept something so potentially life altering (like a new 'step-mother', perhaps?) and be fine, simply because they're told to do so.

your good fortune was in having a loving and nurturing mother (and grandparents) capable of allaying your fears, and kissing away your hurt feelings and confusion.

like everyone else, i'm so in love with this story, and anxious to see where it goes from here! thank you, as always, for opening up to us all in order to share something so personal and moving. the fact that you do it so beautifully well is a wonderful bonus. xoxo

At Monday, November 13, 2006 3:54:00 PM, Blogger Semina said...

Minka ~ That "Thank You" changed Semina in a way that she did not understand at the time.
This my dear Minka as you have preceived is my hug for Semina.
Thank you coming here and for your insightful words.

Neva ~ Semina's Father was awkward and did not understand that all his little girl wanted, was to be a part of his life ~ time and again he would make the same mistakes ~ I wish he could have understood that. It was an era when children were seen but not heard, by most adults.
Thank you for your kind words about my story :}

At Friday, December 15, 2006 7:33:00 AM, Blogger Miz BoheMia said...

Semina!!!! WHERE ARE YOU??? COME BACK!!!! You are missed I tell you, MISSED!

At Friday, December 15, 2006 12:03:00 PM, Blogger Minka said...

I second Miz really are missed.

At Sunday, December 17, 2006 12:04:00 PM, Blogger Semina said...

MizBohemia `~` I will be back soon. Thank you for missing me:}

Minka `~` It feels so good to have friends missing me :}


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